March is filled many memories of just how far has brought me. I was looking through my memories and this day a year ago, I took a few steps for the first time in 21days. So many things have take place over the past year.
however one thing is for sure I have learned so much! Waiting actually will make us stronger in Jesus!
I can remember the many days spent on the chase in our family room unable to walk. unable to breathe. Praying for the pain to end and to be able to walk again. it would be a few months before all those things would come to pass. However I can't tell you the countless times I felt Jesus come and meet with me on that chase... especially in the middle of the night when I would wake up with chest pains and too scared to go back to sleep.
He always spoke peace and brought sleep...
I have found over this year that the fragileness of my health, helped me to grow in places of my life I never thought could.
I was able to let the brokenness in body be a light to all who were around me. Never giving up that God will heal. Smiling through the pain, telling others just how far God has taken us, even if at times it seemed we were crawling, and most of all listening I mean really listening to what God would have me do next with my life.
I learned in the quietness of waiting, I began to grow and I have continued to allow Jesus to grow me...
I love the story of David in the Bible.... How He waited for God to make him king when He was ready! David faced a giant, hated and hunted by king Saul. Yet David waited for Gods perfect timing.
I have came to that point in my health.... I will wait till God is ready!
We seen the rheumatologist last Wednesday. I was so hoping to walk away with answers that very day... That just wasn't how it went.... I love the doctor she is amazing. She was very honest though.. I am a weird case. Pericarditis is rare and often hard to pin point... She did assure us she did not think I have RA, Praise Jesus! however she could not rule out Lupus. She did extensive blood work and we should hear sometime this week! we see her again in a few weeks to decide where we will go from here. She was honest if the effusion returns the doctors will have to step up their game. I cant stay on the high powered meds I am on now no longer than a year. I still deal with chronic fatigue, numb hand and arm, and a long list of things that make no sense what so ever... So we are waiting again. I go for another echo in April, I am praying for no effusion, at the same time I am praying for answers of why it keeps returning.
I know just like God had David, He has me ! That He has great and wonderful things in store for me !
In closing, I don't know what giant you may be facing.... but I do know the God who already has the answers ... Just don't give up ! The growing pains in waiting are so worth it!
Thank you for stopping by!